Sonia's poems

First topic message reminder :

My poems :

Ruins Of Roses:

Here I stand, In the middle
Of the ruins of roses
Everything beautiful,
Is dead and gone
Every memory, faded
Life and death and separated 
By a very fine line
The same line 
That divides me
Somewhere in my mind
If you aren't here 
I'm a ghost, I walk all alone.
No one will see,The tears I cry.
They are hidden 
By the pain in my eyes
All i posses,Is one last breath
As I stand, In the ruins of roses.

You make me smile
When this life loses it's meaning
You make me laugh
When all I've been doing is crying
You make me feel loved
When everyone seems to hate me
And until now, 
You haven't deserted me 
Like everyone has, 
So many times before
You've shown me that life
Is so much more, than what I see
So much more than it seems to be
You made me open my eyes
And you taught me to see,
And with you here I've learnt so many things
One of them being, how much you mean to me
So we've come to far to let this go
And in your eyes I'll always know
That there's a place for me in this twisted world
That theres one person who won't let me fall
Thank you for being, what I dream of
Above all, thank you for being yourself 

I'm at the end
Of where I dreamt of being
And now, standing on the edge
I want to fall and scream
I want this life to pass me by
I want to be told that I can cry
I want my tears to burn me
To put me out of my misery
Nothing is what it was supposed to be
Nothing is worth while
I'm sick of crying
Behind my fake smile
I can't take the thought of dying
Without walking that last mile
But I've died inside
From something I dont know
When I thought that I had found
A safer place hidden beneath the ground
I realised there was no place safe enough
I realised I can never do enough

The phantom:

You aren't anything you seem to be
In fact, you're just a symbol of misery
You're a phantom of the worst kind
You're a ghost of a crooked mind
You're a saint to every sinners heart
You're the memory torn apart
I'm so happy that you aren't there
Because I could not live another day
Acting like I didn't care
I'm so happy that you don't matter
All I wanted was for you to disappear
To be a shadow where I would linger
Where no one could point a finger
I want you to disappear, I want you gone
I've said that so many times
But in the same breath, I fell at your feet
I've said that I would never let you back in
But you're here now, because you came back
This time, I will choose myself
I never want to see you again
You can state my mistakes to a mirror
You can dictate my flaws to a crowd
I'll never ask for your love or forgiveness
Before this hurts anymore
I want you to disappear 

so beautiful

Survivor of Violence wrote:
so beautiful

Thank you :')

It's obvious we're dying 
As we lay here crying
Putting our faith 
In what we don't know
Just so we can feel
Like we can let go
This isn't another story
Of someone with lost glory
Or a secret that belongs
To a heart that's been wronged 
Emotions can't be expressed 
Like they were before
When the trust between us
Could counter the lies told to us
When the love between us
Could overcome the way they hated us
When the faith in our hearts
Kept us alive, like a work of art
That disappeared so easily
Like it was never here at all
Sometimes I wonder about you
But most of the time I try to forget
And tell myself not to regret
What we both needed to do

Heres where I draw the line
The little space in your mind
Along the memory of you and me
I'll make it so hard to find
I'll make you silently 
Regret what you did to me
I'm not revengeful 
But I deserve to be happy
They'll see your lies
The way I saw through the disguise
Yes, it took a while
But I finally realised
Every lie, every dream
Every aimless scream at me
Now I'll laugh when you come back 
Its too late to get back on track
You've made your mistakes
And you were my biggest mistake
Now I'm free from your bonds
In the darkest hour
Don't call my name
Because I'll only be 
That beautiful monster  

Darling don't you see
There's no such thing as
"meant to be"
This life is a mystery
One that grows everyday
And if you plan it
The joy goes away
You can't expect to see the future
Standing right here
And you can't expect to know
Where this is going to go
It's the simple moments
That we always seem to lose
While we plan for something new
We forget to live for that moment
And before we even know, we've lost it
I don't want to waste any more time
Because at some point it seems like a crime
Forget the future, I'm sure we'll see someday
That today is all that belongs to you and me

Anger and Sadness are my best friends 
They both held me by the hand
They said they'd never leave 
Because they truly cared
They were there for me
When Love and Happiness left
Misery won't let go of me
Pains got her eye on me
Affliction told me "everyone's a friend"
Suffering embraced me
And told me this is life
Life then introduced me
To wanting to die
Hope deserted me long ago
She couldn't take me anymore
She said shed never dealt before
With a pessimist like me
Loyalty went along with Fidelity 
When they said no one would come for me
Truth said he'd be back
But creeped out of my heart
When this lie passed my lips
I'm counting on the Devil now
To take me in and hold me close
And when an Angel comes along 
My true Love will close the doors

Why do I break and so easily 
Fall at your feet when you call my name
Why do I bend and so easily
Fall for whatever you say
I've done this before and every time
Came out of the war zone covered in grime
I tell myself i won't fall again
I'll hold my head up, I'll stay strong
But what I actually do seems so wrong
I crumble when you call and I'd give you my all
Without a second thought, 
Without knowing what you're thinking 
I tell you I'd do anything
Do you care to define your dreams
Because they seem to be fading 
But I'll hold on for as long as you need me
I could walk out anytime
But it could kill me
Please just say you need me 

I can't breath, I wish I had someone 
Someone to share my misery with 
Someone who actually cared
But that someone is a dream
And dreams don't come true
For me, in this false reality 
I don't want to whine
But I'm so numb
I can't find anything else
To do with my time
My head gets heavy 
And my eyes get drowsy
Hours later, I'm still waiting
Waiting for that somebody
Who'll save me from myself
Who'll save me from my personal hell
If I wait a minute longer
I'm sure I'll go crazy 
Isn't it time, you came along
And tried to save me?

I've made my share of mistakes
I've walked on enough broken glass
I've burnt all the bridges down
And now I'm going to turn it around
I'll built my castle from the dirt
I'll make it touch the clouds
And from the top I'll scream so loud
To the spectators in the crowd
I'll ask them if they remember 
When they said I couldn't do anything
I'll ask them if they still
Can say that they're better than me
I'm picking up the pieces
I'm covering up the wounds
But I'll keep the scars to remind me
That all good things can disappear too soon
But I'll still hold on
And if all this comes crashing down
I'll hold my tears and tell myself
That it isn't too late to turn it around
I'll seek redemption and perfection 
I'll make sure nothing can touch me 
All that's left is to turn these dreams into reality

i like the last one a lot. inspirational. just what i need :)

itslikelectiveamnesia wrote:i like the last one a lot. inspirational. just what i need :)

Thanks I'm glad you liked it

Don't you ever see 
How you torment me
With the little things you say
It's my misery
This is something I must do
Because I'd fallen in love 
With this feeling and forgot you
Through my tears
The lies become more clear
I saw we were fooling 
No one but ourselves 
When we said we wanted 
No one but ourselves 
I'd been lying to myself
Convinced I wanted no one else
But you weren't lying
When you said you wanted me
This was the cause of my misery
I should've known not to play
The games that were played on me
I should've had my feet on the ground
I can still turn this around
This is for your safety
That you must let go of me
Because another day like this
Will bring you nothing but misery 

Ever since you left
I've been looking to replace you
With love that wasn't true
Trying to make up for time
That was lost like a crime
Trying to forget 
How we wasted life in regrets
And now I regret
Not spending every moment of it with you
But our mistakes is how we learn
And I've made quite a few
But you teach me to believe in something new
You aren't here, but I alway knew
I'd be in your heart, I'd be close to you
You're still close to me too
A display of emotion feels fake
When what we had can't be replaced 
I don't want to forget
I don't want to regret
You were perfect and I'll never have that
But I'm proud to have had you around
You're love is precious
I promise I'll never lose that

i love your poems, they make me speechless so that's why i don't comment them. believe me, there's no words expressing my feelings to your poems

Survivor of Violence wrote: i love your poems, they make me speechless so that's why i don't comment them. believe me, there's no words expressing my feelings to your poems

Thank you so much, Kate :')

I'm running out of things to say
Because you take my breath away
And now you've made me suffocate 
You seem to build me up
Then just go and leave me this way
I could ask why, you could save the day
But how'd that help if you never show
You've left me alone when I needed you the most
You lurked in the shadows like a lonely ghost
Who had so many undead friends
But how'd that matter when you play pretend
When you play your games with my heart
Like it hasn't already been torn apart
I'm a perfect mess and you're a work of art
It's been like this from the start
But I hold on, I pretend there's hope for us
I scream your name, in places you won't see
I wait for when we'll be alone
Where we can call home, and I'll hold you close
And tell you how you suffocate me
How you hurt me, how I'm sick of you  deserting me
And last of all, when your heart's in my hands
I'll tell you how much you mean to me 

You're so scared that you'll break 
So scared, that you never even bend
Before anyone's seen the start
You've already rehearsed the end
You've convinced yourself that this life
Can be put back on track all by yourself
You don't consider having another
Heart and hand to help and guide you
Someone because of who you'll regret
Saying that everyone isn't perfect 
You don't let anyone inside
Yet you say they run and hide
How hard would it be
To make you open up and see
That not everyone wants to hurt you
That not everyone will desert you
That not everyone doesn't love you
And that someone can make you happy
I'll wait until you learn to see
That there's hope if you give up on fantasy  

I don't think I'm ready
For another love story
That ends in tragedy 
And you're not up
For another day where
you don't give a fuck
about how you feel
And how this feels real
Where we're both hiding 
From what could fix us
Because we're paranoid
That it'll break us
I rather be, broken in your arms
Than holding on all alone
Like I am when you aren't home
Like you are when 
You're acting like you aren't dreaming
Of what this life 
Can be when shadows aren't screaming 
Like I am when
I fantasise that I'm alright 
Without you and I smile at strangers
Wishing they were you 
We're so paranoid, and destroyed
But I don't want to fight this alone
If we continue this losing battle 
I suggest we do it together 

¡sonia! wrote:You're so scared that you'll break 
So scared, that you never even bend
Before anyone's seen the start
You've already rehearsed the end
You've convinced yourself that this life
Can be put back on track all by yourself
You don't consider having another
Heart and hand to help and guide you
Someone because of who you'll regret
Saying that everyone isn't perfect 
You don't let anyone inside
Yet you say they run and hide
How hard would it be
To make you open up and see
That not everyone wants to hurt you
That not everyone will desert you
That not everyone doesn't love you
And that someone can make you happy
I'll wait until you learn to see
That there's hope if you give up on fantasy  

first part of this poem reminds of some of what my mom tells me haha. i close myself off a lot from other people and dont allow them to help. good job on this sonia

itslikelectiveamnesia wrote:

¡sonia! wrote:You're so scared that you'll break 
So scared, that you never even bend
Before anyone's seen the start
You've already rehearsed the end
You've convinced yourself that this life
Can be put back on track all by yourself
You don't consider having another
Heart and hand to help and guide you
Someone because of who you'll regret
Saying that everyone isn't perfect 
You don't let anyone inside
Yet you say they run and hide
How hard would it be
To make you open up and see
That not everyone wants to hurt you
That not everyone will desert you
That not everyone doesn't love you
And that someone can make you happy
I'll wait until you learn to see
That there's hope if you give up on fantasy  

first part of this poem reminds of some of what my mom tells me haha. i close myself off a lot from other people and dont allow them to help. good job on this sonia

Thats what the poem is about
Thanks Clare

Why can't we take this life, 
Like it's all we have left
Why can't we hold in the pain
And Speak with one last breath,
Why can't we just let it go
And see a world we wouldn't know
If we always refused to show 
Who we were on the inside
How we act when we take sides
How our wars go into the night
We fight for what we term as right
All we ever do is fight
This, I've come to realise
Because I keep my eyes open
I keep looking all the time
Like I'm a victim of some crime
Like I'm the one who's been abandoned 
By the truth that comes to you
When you decide to close your eyes
You've decided to let the paranoia go
That's when I let my neurosis show
We're all broken, so alone
In our restless hearts is where we're home

You know you aren't at your best
When just breathing seems like a test
Of your endurance, your capacity
Have you finally understood me?
The lost soul, the forsaken goal
The long lost tragedy, no memory
I'm losing sight of the light
Waiting for the dark to take me
To a place I can finally be
Set alone, set free
Let the pain take your body
To a place where you'll be numb
Don't ask to be able to feel
Because it's a secret we know
The moment pain take over
There's no where to go
The moment happiness takes over
You lose sight of your goal
So give up your little war
Between your dreams and the truth 
Give up that war you use
to disguise your every mistake 
Don't let anything take over
You've got no where to run
Lose yourself, become numb 

If there's hope, why is it so hard to find
When you feel like you've been left behind
By the optimism that once would guide you
Has the sense of pride deserted you
Have you tasted shame one too many times
You can never seem to find words that rhyme
That could ever express your pain
When your dreams fall like rain 
Everything you once held close
Now seems to be letting you go
The dreams that you could reach
Disappeared so quickly, like mockery 
The glorious mockery of your prestige 
Your castles of hope make you fall to your knees
Have the heavens come crashing down
Is there no one around
No angel to save you, no devil to intoxicate you
No memories for you to hold on to
And it isn't my duty to scare you
But don't you see what you've lost
Your soul is now out of your control
This was once in your hands
Now it seems to be something you never had
Where'd it go, it can't disappear
Because it's been here for so many years
I know we all need light to see
But in the darkness, find your reality 
 

Come down from your cloud
I've said it out loud,
Everyones a liar.
And there's a fire
In your eyes, in my heart
It's been there from the start
The spark that was never expressed 
When my mind got depressed.
We're alone in this fight
But I'm alright
Because you're on my mind
you're the only thing I find
When my heart breaks 
When my faith aches 
And looks for an escape
I know dreams are fake
But what if this is more
Is there a way to really know?
Unless we take a chance 
And hope this goes
The best possible way
Before the end of this day 

I thought you could save me
But all you ever do is make me
Hate myself, hurt myself
Like that wasn't what I'd been doing
From the beginning 
I'm not perfect 
You aren't worth it
You made me believe in you
You made me point out my mistakes
And write them in blood
You took my flaws like a flood
Said they damaged you 
Said you could still stand me
You never believed in me
Never cared for me
But I drown in your lies
The hurricane in my heart 
I'm going insane 
I rather die than play these games
Do you even care?
For anything but your self?
You're a selfish twat 
And I could never say enough of that
But I'll hold the pain in
You'll never see how I really feel
I'm tired of anger and hate
You can walk away
You wouldn't care, 
But I promise I'll be ok  

Ive learnt that one can only pretend
That the pain will soon end
The pain never goes away
It's like a knife over your head
It may seem to heal
But that isn't real
I don't mean to be a pessimist
I don't mean to make you feel
Like nothing gets better
But the truth can't hide forever
Pain is a reoccurring disease 
It's never too far from you
It comes back when life improves
When you feel like you can take
Anything thrown at you
That's when it haunts you
It gets the better of you 
Then it forgives you, and goes away
Right when you think you'll see the light
You right back in the fight
It comes back to haunt you
Just remember, you'll never be
Completely free of misery 

Staring at blank Walls 
That seem to be 
Smarter than me
Because I can't breath
I feel like I need
Someone to help me
Hold on to belief.
Crying for anyone 
To pay a little heed
To what I really need.
But everyone's abandoned 
Me, a lost cause 
The people I loved
Now the cause of suffering.
Screaming their fears
In my ears
Like I don't have any 
In fact I have many
Demons who haunt me
Would you like to join their army?
I don't mean to judge you
But the way you're acting 
Makes you seem so selfish 
I can't stand you anymore